I guess no one's listening. heh

I usually find that I get frustrated because people won't get to the point or a good portion of the information they give me is "useless". I'd much prefer to read to get my information.

So yeah, I know what you're talking about...some of it, though, may also have to do with your learning style. I'm a very visual learner as is my son (although he's so strongly visual he is believed to have a learning disorder because he can't adapt when he needs to listen). So it may not be just personality...

I stopped talking much about 15 years ago, and now all I do is listen. Makes people twitchy, which I also watch. Which makes people even twitchier.

I find I listen to the words in context of all the other input, visual and intuitive. I tend to get what the person is not saying as well as what they are saying. Which, you guessed it, makes them twitchier yet.

If something like that goes on with you, then maybe you're reacting to the twitchiness of the person you are listening to. Maybe you are too good at listening -- including the broad spectrum of stuff they'd rather distract you from.

I find that I can listen very well if its at a party and I just want to be invisible (that ole introversion). I can get others talking and I can enjoy that, for a while, and never be put on the spot to perform. I can also be a good listener if it is around specific intentions (I was a therapist for 16 years). What sometimes interferes with my listening is my intuition that often completes the thoughts of others or summerizes them. If I can share my intuitions at the right moment the other person is usually grateful in that they have gotten a bit befuddled. Intuition works FAST and in a piece, so if it isn't shared it is often lost. That is why I do best with an easy back and forth conversations rather than long discourses or story-telling.

I totally know what you mean about the zoning out thing. It happens to me all the time, especially when I am in Art History class. It is soooo boring and unless I make myslef concentrate and take notes the entire time I zone out and daydream about doing my Calculus homework. lol. Even if I am talking to people i am trying to help ( I am a tutor), I still zone out and when I catch myself and I have no idea what they are talking about I nod, smile and change the subject or go on to a different problem so they don't catch me not paying attention to them. It's terrible. I find the best way to keep my attention to to make eye contact and pretend like what they are saying is super complicated and repeat it to them like I am stupid or something. It makes them feel better and I don't feel bad for not paying attention.

And about the intuition thing, I have found that if I am talking to someone and I catch on to one little thing that they are saying but not really saying, they won't shut up! Its like I have uncovered their little secret and they can't stop until the tell me everything about it. And the randomist people ( like someone I have known for 5 minutes) start telling me their darkest and weirdest secrets. It is so weird. And then the whole zoning out thing comes out again and then the people that can't stop talking get upset that I am not paying attention to their entire life story. So weird and very annoying because I am not an empathetic person and the cycism in my personality tends to show its ugly head when something really stupid comes out of the other person's mouth. This is why I try to avoid the emotional unstable because they are really hard to listen to without slapping.

I deal with the public on a daily basis. I have heard the same stories so many times, I usually can predict the out come, but have to hear them out before I give my 2 cents. I really have to concentrate on listening and staying in the moment so I don't miss anything important.

With many people, and especially long winded types, I often figure out what they're trying to say and just cut them off, getting to the point, and finishing it for them, if I can get a word in edgewise. I can tell this often annoys them and they go ahead and say what they were going to anyway. I guess I'm being rude, but I can't help myself. Once I get a feeling for the way people think, I can almost always predict what they will say about something, give or take a few words. So I guess that makes me a poor listener, because sometimes I’m surprised when they say something else, after I’ve already turned them off.

What is most annoying is that a lot of what I call “loud mouth extroverts” have set stories that they tell, and they don’t seem to be able to remember they’ve already told me the story, so I have to keep hearing it over again. At which point I realize there’s no use trying to interrupt them, they’re running on an automatic program, and I just let my mind wander until they finish their routine. I generally try to avoid getting into conversations with people like that, it seems like they just want to hear themselves talk.

I'm told that I listen well. People view this both happily and negatively
Happy people realize that I think everyone has a story to tell and I have pretty good filters (except with certain emotionally charged subjects) so I can listen for hours unless I have something pressing. (Although I'm making mental lists, watching my environment, plotting to take over the world :)
The people who know me best think I'm insidious because others just sort of blurt out *everything* to me and I file it away for future reference. One friend said that if I came with an instruction manual it would say in small print;
"Warning; will suck your brain dry and make unrepentant use of all information. May leave user with a feeling of having said WAY too much."

I listen very well (can be in the moment, recall what the other person said and how they said it, etc), but I definitely pick & choose how often I really want to do this, these days. If I'm going to be there, talking with someone, bothering to have the conversation at all, I'm probably going to be pretty sincere about listening to them. Otherwise, I avoid people altogether, just stay home, skip the conversation, move on in a hurry, etc.